The world is a rapidly changing place. Oh I know, it might
not look that way as you rush to your window in search for flying cars or at the very least;
Those skimpy aluminum foil dresses that "future women" always would wear in bad 60's movies depicting some outlandishly impossible year like 2005 that made them look like they were smuggling two baked potatoes..
And while we go by our normal day-to-day operations; we're not only blissfully unaware of exactly how fast we are soaring through cosmos, but we never stop to give thought to the casualties left behind in the wake of progress.
So what caused these deep, introspective, breast mentioned reflections?
Tips and
Tricks Magazine is going to that big Coffee Table in the sky.
Big deal right? Just another gaming magazine that didn't make it, and I'm sure that there will be others sprouting up like the pipe plants in Mario Brothers to replace it. Right?
Wrong.
Tips and Tricks Magazine didn't die out because of poor writing, lack of content or any of the things that kills off magazines. It died out because of us, because of change, and because of the dreaded...
INTERNETZ!
You see, fifteen years ago, if you wanted codes and tricks and ways to cheat in video games, you had two choices;
A) You'd figure them out and trade them with your friends. (Which
is just friggin' creepy if you stop to think about it because we ALL know the Konami code, but can YOU remember where you first heard it? I damn sure can't and I think that I may even have been BORN with it preprogrammed into my skull.
B) You loitered around the grocery store in hopes that someone else had ripped open a copy of Nintendo Power, Power Gamer, or Tips and Tricks so that you could speed read and glean any information before you were caught, or your mother had finished buying groceries.
That was it. There was no magic of the internet. There was no being merely ten seconds away from
the answer to ANY question you could think of.
We had gaming magazines.
Stacks and stacks of them. Some without covers because the feature 8-bit Princess made a better wall hanging than paper protector, but stacks and stacks none-the-less. You would organize them by game relevance, or write down the GOOD codes in a tattered notebook, and you would trade them for information that you didn't have with your peers.
And now it is folding, and I blame the internet.
I can not only get cheats, tips, hints, walk thrus and guides for ANY game that I can Google - for FREE, but I can also download hacks, mods, or saved game files that save me the time and energy that it used to take to actually PLAY the game.
And we *did* play the game. None of this "beat it once, move on to the next one" crap. Nonono. If you beat Mario? You started challenging yourself.
Can I beat it without using fireballs? Can I beat it without dying? Can I beat it while beating my little sister who cried and whined for mom because I never let her play the ONE game *she* had that had something to do with magic ponies or crap like that?
And now it is done. Tips and Tricks was just the first nail in a quickly closing coffin and we just sit back and
shrug because we're moving so fast that we can't see the change. But what else has the internet killed? What is it currently ....killing?
How about music?
Sure, the RIAA wants you to believe that musicians are dying penniless in the streets, so poor that they can only afford ONE gold plated house in a neighborhood that you'd be arrested for looking at; but music, she is a changing.
Back in the day you HAD to buy the album. There was no "online preview" or iTuning your favorite songs off of an album so that you didn't have to listen to the crappy ones.
No.
You had to march RIGHT into the store, pick up Vince Neil's debut solo album and say to yourself, "It'll be JUST like a new Motley Crue album! I mean, he's the lead singer, right?" as you made one of the most embarrassing and regretful mistakes of your young life.
Now? You'd know the album sucked like a giant robot maid stealing a planet's atmosphere before you even LEFT for the store - IF you even left for the store.
How about movies?
My VCR used to be my best friend. We'd laugh, and hug, and play - running through fields and having picnics as we stared lovingly into the sunset, it's digital face happily blinking twelve....
And now? She sits under my entertainment center - forgotten. Sure,
the DVD player was younger and hotter, and she would do freaky naughty things that my VCR would never even *dream* of doing often involving Jell-O and/or wrestling...
...but you still needed her when you wanted to watch that favorite movie, or quickly tape a television show while you were out.
But with the internet, any show I want is just a download away. Televisions shows, series, - hell, even NetFlix has a download cafe now. Why go out to the movies, or even go all the way into the living room when whatever I want to see is only a few keystrokes away?
And lastly...
...what about porn?
I will state flatly,
and in one voice for every man reading this article.
"If I had the internet as a teenager, I would have *never* left my room."
Fifteen years ago you were running through National Geographic magazines and the occasional medical journal at the library for even the tiniest hope of seeing a breast. Or with the odds of hitting the lotto or a stray meteor touching down in your field of view - you'd stumble across a real, ACTUAL Playboy book.
You'd stalk the local Magazine shops on trash day, rifle through your Father's sock drawer or do anything else under the sun to get your fix. It was a boobie safari and there was nothing you wouldn't do or no where you wouldn't venture in hopes of seeing skin.
And NOW?! Now you can type in almost ANYTHING in an unfiltered Google search and countless boobies, breasts and tempting tatas of every shape and size come raining down on you like a magical candy shower from gumdrop heaven.
So in closing, don't shrug
off Tips and Tricks following the tunnel of light towards that big Newsstand above us. Stop, hang your head, and just for a moment reflect on the other things that we used to love that the internet has killed.
And while you're doing that?
I'll be going through your sock drawer for naughty magazines.
-Coyote
Article Source: www.tentonhammer.com.
WOW Gold was released in 2000 and is part of the WOW Hits series.